Mikael’s 7 tips for paternity leave in Helsinki
What did nine months as a stay-at-home dad in Helsinki teach Mikael Sokero?
“As a father, I see Helsinki with new eyes,” says Mikael Sokero. He uses cobblestones to help rock nine-month-old Bruno to sleep and meets up with friends in the city’s numerous family spaces.
Before Bruno was born, Mikael Sokero had no idea what kind of city Helsinki is from the perspective of a parent with a small child. Now, with nine months of experience, Mikael says he has noticed many things in his surroundings that make life easier for a baby’s father. These include accessible entrances, the baby-care rooms in department stores and shopping centres, and public transport tickets. Or rather, the lack of a ticket. In Helsinki, travelling with a pram or pushchair is always free of charge.
They say that parenthood changes a person. In this article, Mikael Sokero reveals that a young child can also transform the relationship between a father and his home city.
Insight #1: One thing per day
“All the time, more men in Helsinki want to take parental leave and take on caregiving responsibilities. It’s really a unique opportunity to get to know your own child and at the same time detach from the work thoughts that have been spinning around in your head for years.
The popularity of parental leave has increased in Finland, especially after the legislation passed in 2022 that allows parental leave to be divided equally between partners. Altogether, a child can be at home with a parent for 320 days, or about 14 months.
I might live in a bubble, but in my own circle of highly educated Helsinki friends engaged in expert work, there are several other men who stay at home with their child for longer than the child’s mother. My partner Lotta was home with Bruno for six months. My parental leave, followed by my annual holiday, lasts a total of nine months.
As we do this interview, Bruno is nine months old. I’m quite a structured and active father. I want to get as much as possible out of this unprecedented time, but also enjoy the lack of schedules. I try to plan one activity per day. At the same time, I try to accept that I won’t manage to get everywhere.”
Insight #2: In Helsinki, community-driven fatherhood takes some effort
“A good friend of mine spent his baby year on the West Bank of Palestine. There his child constantly attracted attention, with willing arms everywhere. From the perspective of a family with a small child, Finland seems to have an individualistic culture. In a Helsinki café, people don’t usually offer to hold Bruno, but it’s not out of impoliteness. I believe people want to give us space and peace.
I’m a social person and even on paternity leave I don’t want to get stuck at home. In Helsinki, you can find company, but it requires a bit of initiative.
The local NGO Helsinki Mission runs the Albertin olohuone (Albert’s Living Room) community space at Albertinkatu 33 in the Kamppi district. It is a free, easy-to-enter hangout space where families with babies and older people meet over coffee and chats. And unlike in cafés, there are always plenty of arms ready to hold Bruno! On Mondays from 9.30–14 the programme includes an English-language International Monday.
Our favourite lunch restaurant Pompier is next door, in the courtyard of the volunteer fire brigade’s building at Albertinkatu 29. The service is truly exceptional: the waiters come over to hold the babies, bring toys and spend a moment playing. It makes everyone feel good.”
Insight #3: Children and dads all enjoy Helsinki’s playgrounds
“In Helsinki, a playground means a park that has a building with indoor spaces and an outdoor area with play equipment. Trained instructors organise and lead activities in the playgrounds, and they are always free of charge. Bruno and I like the playground Loru on the third floor of the Central Library Oodi the most. It’s honestly a paradise for families with kids. Last time we were lying around in a dimly lit padded room, looking up at a starry sky and listening to the instructor reading rhymes. The programme is rich and interesting. I recommend having a look!”
In the library area, babies and toddlers hang out on a large play mat. You can build tunnels from soft blocks and crawl around. I often arrange to meet friends at Oodi, and we stay there for hours. The café sells baby food and there is also a microwave.
And one more tip for slightly older children: up near the ceiling on the third floor is a secret room forbidden to adults, reachable by moving a certain book.
In summer, Helsinki’s playgrounds offer free lunch for children. I believe we will also head there with a plate and spoon in our bag.”
Insight #4: With a pram, you learn to appreciate accessibility
“Before becoming a father, I never paid attention to whether public transport stops were accessible or not. When moving around with a pram, I appreciate that you can roll into trams, the metro and local trains without steps or thresholds, and into low-floor buses quite easily too.
In bad weather, I happily use the dry and heated underground walkways in central Helsinki. Coming from Töölö, I go into Kamppi shopping centre and follow the indoor routes to Forum. From there you could get via the Central Railway Station all the way to Kaisaniemi, but we usually make a detour through the Stockmann car park into the Stockmann department store and out the door towards the tram stop heading to Punavuori.
With a pram, you learn to use the smoothest possible lift connections. When coming up from the metro in the city centre, I prefer Kamppi station because you can get to street level with one lift. At the Central Railway Station you might need to use three.”
Insight #5: Baby-care rooms make hanging out in the city easier
“Of course you can change a nappy on the go, but sometimes there’s a need to wash Bruno in the middle of an outing. As a father, I’ve now discovered the baby-care rooms in central Helsinki, which to my surprise can be found not only in Oodi but in all shopping centres and department stores. These spaces, intended for people moving around with children, typically have at least a nappy-changing area, a small toilet for children, breastfeeding spots and a mini kitchen for heating milk and baby food.
My own favourite is the baby-care room on the fourth floor of the Sokos department store. I don’t think many people know about it, as the space is peaceful and always in perfect condition. You get the key from the staff.
At Stockmann in the city centre the baby-care room is on the sixth floor. Stockmann also has nappy-changing facilities in the men’s toilets on floors 8, 6, 5 and –2A. The doors are open; no keys are needed.
Shopping centres such as Forum, Kamppi, Itis, Tripla, Redi and Kaari also all have baby-care rooms, all free and open to everyone.
Helsinki is constantly getting better, but sometimes change is a bit slow. In some places, the baby-care spot is still, strangely enough, only in the women’s restroom. At Café Lasipalatsi I’ve already got used to boldly going into the women’s facilities to change Bruno’s nappy.”
Insight #6: Walking routes according to need
“At the moment Bruno takes two naps a day. I plan our route according to the time of day and his need for sleep. If I’m trying to get Bruno to fall asleep, I make use of the cobblestones in the city centre, for example at Senate Square and on our home street Sepänkatu. If it would be better for him to stay awake, we pick routes with a smooth surface.
From our home in Punavuori it’s a fifteen-minute walk to the city centre, but I also like to push the pram towards the open sea at Eiranranta. Then we continue along the seaside past Kaivopuisto to the Market Square. On paternity leave I easily walk 10,000–15,000 steps a day.
I enjoy looking at old Art Nouveau architecture, which you find especially in Katajanokka and Ullanlinna. In the dark you can easily see into people’s homes, and you end up comparing the decorations on their tiled stoves.
Constant everyday movement and being outdoors a lot are really good for someone who does thinking-intensive work. In the evening my body is tired, but unlike when working, my mind isn’t. I haven’t slept this well in at least ten years – not until paternity leave!”
Insight #7: Favourite restaurants and cafés stay the same
“It’s been reassuring to realise that having a child doesn’t turn your lifestyle upside down, it simply adds something new to it.
I’ve lived in many parts of the city and I have lots of favourite restaurants and cafés. The following places are spacious enough that you can usually get in with a pram too.
In Kallio we enjoy Flät 14, although there are small steps going in. In the city centre you often find us at La Torrefazione in Lasipalatsi. In Punavuori’s Merikortteli block it’s nice to roll into the spacious Café Levain with a pram. Kaffa Roastery right beside it has the scent of freshly roasted coffee drifting around, and the space is cosy.
An especially nice aspect of paternity leave is that I can arrange unhurried lunch and coffee meetups with friends who are in the same life situation. Children enjoy being where adults enjoy being.
We’re soon moving to the Konepaja area to live in a larger flat. I’m already looking forward to the spacious play areas there for Bruno, both in the front and back yards of the building. And when Lotta and I have some time just the two of us after the move, I want to suggest a visit to Kino Konepaja, the small and cosy cinema there.”
Mikael and Bruno enjoy spending time on the third floor of Oodi and often arrange to meet friends there.
There are several underground walkways in the city centre. Mikael only takes the pram there when the weather is particularly bad.
Mikael Sokero, 37, is spending nine months with his firstborn on combined parental leave and annual holiday. After that he will return to his role as Capacity Building Lead at the think tank Demos Helsinki.
In Helsinki, parents often leave their children to nap in the fresh outdoor air while keeping an eye on them from inside. It’s one sign of the strong sense of safety in Helsinki.
The family’s dog Frida usually does not join Mikael and Bruno on their city outings.
“Frida is getting so old that she can’t manage long walks anymore,” Mikael says.
